Its amazing how quickly things change when one realizes how wrong it truly is.

Especially when one decides to love themselves and only wants the best for their lives.

So I realized something. When adults express themselves why are others quick to jump defensive and call names. Everyone falls short.

Who am I to judge though?

The respect. The lack thereof. The fact that some people that feel a certain amount of insignificance in certain areas of their lives need to make others feel disrespected and insignificant in order to boost a deflated ego.

Yeah. Feelings change fast.

Games are seldom played by grown ups and I left the preschool teaching thing in Boston. I won’t raise a grown boy into a man to understand the way a woman should be treated.

See I once failed to understand my worth and failure to make a man present a sacrifice for the help that the woman is going to provide for a mans life so they began to believe they are owed certain things from women.

One had the audacity to remind me that I owed him something. I believe I paid more than a few debts. So many bail outs, so many concerts, a relationship, a bleeding heart and soul. So I am thankful for that because it taught me to walk away from what was presented to me recently. If it looks like a duck quacks like a duck and I used to spend so much time ducking my self worth with another quack I think the lesson learned taught me to run far far away.

Because Adam gave a whole rib in his sacrifice to make the woman. And here men today are asking for ‘help’ from women that aren’t their wives, fiancée’s or they are even interested in pursuing.

Lupe said it best. What constitutes a prostitute is the pursuit of profit.

The time comes to shut down anything that is not promoting your future endeavors and your betterment of self.

I mean how can two walk together unless they agree about the direction.

Why would I as a woman who is giving her life to walk with Christ walk anywhere with a man who won’t even come to see what my Savior is talking about.

How many times should one woman invite a man that claims to be interested in her to church to worship God with her before she realizes maybe he’s just not that interested.

Interested in aborting my promises, maybe. Interested in proving that the nightmare I had was really really real.

Some people just don’t line up with my destiny so they need to be released.

Because if he can’t be interested in getting to know and love my creator he will never fully understand me enough to respect me enough to give me the treatment I deserve.

That respect.

So sometimes it comes a time when its time to let God be God. If he is constantly pulling someone out of your life and not even allowing you to be around that person since you miss each other or miss phone calls then maybe the message has been loud and clear.

I mean how can I forget the story of Balaam and the donkey. Angels protecting me from what God knows has been sent to destroy me.

Its time to let it be what God says it will be. Move flesh out the way because only a God who knows the plans He has for me to prosper and not to fail can know who belongs in my life and who doesn’t.

So yes now. I trust. I believe God.

I am finally letting go.

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