My thoughts are irrelevant to some.

That’s okay. I don’t live my life to please people. I don’t take to heart their words thoughts or opinions.

Especially embittered hearts hurting from being pushed away from what they thought would last forever.

I get it. The hurt lays heavy on a broken heart never allowing the icebox where their heart used to be to thaw to feelings concerning others.

So I say I don’t care. But I do. I care for hurting people. Literally all day.

I’m a CNA.

I work the Alzheimer’s and Dementia unit. I deal with people who lost their minds not being able to let go of the hurts of the past. They hold my hand and tell me their stories forgetting that the same thing they told me is what they said literally not five minutes prior. Its hard to hold onto your mind hen you’re holding on the things that came to attack it and change ones life and make them never complete their purpose so I get it.

I had someone tell me because of my blog about my experience with domestic violence that they felt no empathy for me.

I’m sorry to burst some one who thinks their opinion matters to someone who has been delivered from people that I don’t need the compassion from man.

I didn’t have it while I was in the middle of, and being overtaken by my sorrow. Now I speak on it because I am over the situations so I definitely dont need sorrowful eyes or a co-signment.

See I do this for people who have experienced what I have gone through and like my residents are still holding onto the hurt which may one day take over their minds.

I am walking in freedom. I chose to release. I tell my story because I want others to know that when you let go there is a brighter side on the other side of the rainbow. God has made promises to us and I stand on them. So when you release one thing you allow God to put what He has for you inside of you.

In my personal research I came across Mic 7:8 Do not gloat over me, my enemy! Though I have fallen, I will rise. Though I sit in darkness, the LORD will be my light. Mic 7:9 Because I have sinned against him, I will bear the LORD’S wrath, until he pleads my case and establishes my right. He will bring me out into the light; I will see his righteousness. Mic 7:10 Then my enemy will see it and will be covered with shame, she who said to me, “Where is the LORD your God?” My eyes will see her downfall; even now she will be trampled underfoot like mire in the streets.

I’m like whoa.

Gods word. His way of communicating to me.

So many look to see others fall in despair because they are miserable themselves. But God is a God who sanctifies and sets apart His people. Those who are willing like Samuel to be used by Him. Those who die to their own sinful fleshly nature. Those who turn away from former ways of lives.

See my God is a banner. He does above and before me to fight for me. Lo I am with you always. I am reminded of another promise.

So now.

I say Hallelujah. When trouble comes knocking at my door. I thank God for being my provider. I praise Him continuously.

Had I not gone through all I went through I would not have had this relationship with him. Had I not had this relationship I would have had no peace, joy, happiness, love, purpose. I sing songs with purpose these days because now I know the lane I was called to be in.

Yes. I wanted to do many things. But there is one thing God has that is just for me. There is one place my strengths lie.

So now I walk in victory.

Glad I left a faux victor behind to fall into his own trap of self complacency to never become what he is supposed to accomplished because some people are just designed to be anchors.

Yes. I am thankful. Yes I am free.

And when I praise God continually I rebuke the enemy and all his backlash and he has no other choice but to flee!


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