I will never understand women that stick up for men that do inappropriate things. Then they wonder why the men in their lives can’t get right.

Yes you. You’re probably accepting the unacceptable.

I can’t. I won’t. It’s life.

I’ll never forget the day I saw my daughters father and his girlfriend for the first time after the girl jumped on me when I wasn’t looking. I mean from behind. After I stood in her face in the middle of the street for too long to let us hash it out as women. I mean I was alone. But here she needed her cousin. She needed her Sisters. She needed a pipe. I was still alone and my baby daddy was on her side.

See what had happened was the last time he wrapped his hands around my neck and threw me to the ground I pressed charges. I am a woman. The fact that I can withstand the forty hours of pain delivering his child mandates my respect. I will demand it by any means necessary.

I guess he didn’t like the way I stood up for myself.

So the following year after being snaked by his girlfriend, the barren one, he told the police standing nearby that I started the mess. Maybe I did. But my non violent protest did not call for pepper spray or to be lead into the county jail waiting on family members who couldn’t wait to laugh and talk about me to come and bail me out.

Such is life.

Yes. I refuse to let a man be caught up in boyish behavior. Not with me anyways.

And no that doesn’t mean that I need to judge anyone so God will call down judgement on me.

If I don’t like it I don’t like it, that doesn’t mean that I’m hating. Common Sense said it best!!

But for real. I’m a grown woman. I am just getting a chance to know and understand how things go in certain settings. There are certain men I would never think should be sending me pictures of them with erections in red underwear.

Pinky swear. I promise. Pinkies up. I’m not being high siditty. Some things should be kept to themselves and I should never see a man in his red underwear. Or his gray underwear. And the more I learn how to live and respect myself so I truly believe I don’t deserve to have someone sending me almost erotic pictures when I am struggling to be kept.

It’s hard enough resisting the temptation of the beautifully handsome man who holds my face upside down to kiss my lips and forehead. But I do. The man that not just wants to feed me but shares what he has with me. Yes. Men are physical. They want to engage in physical matters. It isn’t about the man that almost. It’s going to be about The man that did.

The man that did.

The man that did disrespect me by trying to appeal to my flesh and get me to cuddle with him so that when I am trying to get deliverance from my lustful flesh At the altar seeing him dancing and singing with the team that is supposed to lead me into worship distracts me to keep me in bondage to the very flesh I am supposed to be fighting.

Such is life.

Or is it?

When women constantly stick up for men saying the way they behave is okay because no one can judge them.

It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or to do anything else that will cause your brother or sister to fall. Romans 14:21

Yes. What about this? What about the fact that my brother sent me a picture of him in his boxers. I had not been entertaining men or my flesh and while my brother was supposed to be pushing me towards Christ asking me continuously to come and cuddle with him at his home while sending me pictures of him in his boxers opened the door to the very same thing I have been praying and asking God to close the door to.

As I struggle with the desires that have now been reintroduced to my flesh with the reminders of my very engaging past I’m on the verge of falling and don’t know how I am going to get back up.

In the words of DMX, I’m slipping I’m falling I gotsta get up.

As I watch the world around me give in to their flesh I understand why the one man I wanted more than any other told me I was different from the other women that he has encountered. Because real men lead women to Christ and not their bedroom. My tears that were shed as I walked away from a man that made my stomach do somersaults, made my spirit leap and my heart skip a beat. For the first time I was breathing deeper and for real this time I was able to exhale.

No. It was not sir red draws. There is no shade. It’s all about being respected as a woman. As I asked him. Was there something I said or a way I represented or presented myself that would make him think I would be alright with seeing him in his underwear? He said no. It’s just nothing. Maybe I’m too much of a square. Maybe I deserve to have someone try to turn me away from this path I’ve been trying to stay on with Christ. Maybe now that I’m supposed to be alright with a man just exposing me to whatever I should go ahead and do all the rest of the things that are now being thrown at me now that my flesh has been reminded of the past.

Or maybe the enemy used his pawn. Is now rewarding him and the women who love to never make a man stand as a man and be accountable want to say it was my fault and look at me sideways because Lord knows I don’t want to love on the women that need love from their sisters before they learn how to love a man. Maybe it’s all to keep us all from our destiny. All because a man is so used to being disrespectful to women because no one has ever held him accountable.

Maybe it’s time.

I’m not used to being liked. Maybe it’s about making sure all us women make it and the men that try to keep us wallowing in mess get a sit down.

So. To the women that still stand up for the men that do wrong. Let a man be a man. Teach him how to grow and be accountable. These men are teaching boys the basics. These men are helping girls grow into womanhood.

So let them do it. Let God deal with them. And let righteousness come forth.

The light of God shines within. He works with each and every one of us. In a judgement free zone we can correct in love. So love as God loves. The one he loves he disciplines. Let correction take place. Only in correction can we grow. Growth and change takes place to make way for newness.

So as we walk into the newness and leave the past behind, know that what God wants to do he needs none of our help with. Let Go and let God and watch him work wonders in the lives of those who believe.

Yes God. I am a believer!!


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