So I’m hanging out with my extended family for pre memorial day festivities.

Its a first for me because its hard to trust a man I am dating around women because of all the women I have allowed into my circle who have done their dirt behind my back.

But we happen to all be there. My guy. My lil sister, her aunt and we are talking.

My sisters aunt happens to be talking about the AIDS epidemic in the Chicagoland area. She would know shes a nurses aide in the hospitals, so I can only imagine how much she has seen in the past few years.

She said for the first date people need to start going to the clinic then going somewhere else because no matter how long you have known a person you will never know whats going on inside their bodies.

I know about that life. 

I had a boyfriend. Thats what his game plan and agenda was. We would go together every three months. 

Everyone is not going to wait until marriage. So for those who are letting their flesh make decisions for them, get checked. Really you cannot trust anyone.

I had a childhood friend.

None of the other children liked to play at her house, and me being a sucker for the underdog and loving the people that no one else wanted to deal with I drew her in and got close to her.

I thought maybe they didnt like her because she was so pretty with a perfect shape, almond shaped eyes and long thick flowing jet black hair. Or maybe it had something to do with the fact that she gave the boys options to choose her over the girlfriends they already had.

Yes. She was one of the boyfriend stealing friends. She did it to others. She did it to me. But thats not why they didnt want to go over her house.

Her mother had AIDS.

Her mother had only ever been with her father. Her father went out found a prostitute or two or three. Whatever. He stepped outside the home and brought back his wife a new baby and a disease that wouldnt go away. HIV. Whoa.

That had me like scared straight throughout my life. I might have had some wild nights, but I was rarely reckless. I was always holding onto that nagging feeling of a husband bringing his wife home a disease, so surely a man that had no ties or love for me would do the same.

Thats why abstinence is fairly easy for me. I love the Lord and even though fornication is a sin against myself I want to please him sure. But my flesh is weak, and when it gets weak I am reminded. I have a daughter to raise and I don’t want to have her being shunned because I have something that won’t go away. 

I get tested regularly.

Then you hear of the stories of people who purposely want to give the disease to others because they have it, and people want to be reckless out in these streets. They dont want to settle in with one person. And sometimes they get involved with someone sexually without first finding out their status.

The world is falling apart around us in shambles, and because of our irresponsibility we allow it to.

So. I know I should be preaching. Sometimes people need to have a friend before they have a pastor/evangelist. They need someone to remind them of everyday consequences before they remind them of salvation. Its hard to get to God when you’re carrying the weight of the world everyday, because those anchors weigh heavy heavy.

Anyway. Everybody. Go get tested. You dont know who got what. You dont know your status youre a threat to your own self because more and more people are living longer lives anyway. But the more you know.

I would never want anyone to feel like I am talking about them or their partners. The facts remain, promiscuity breeds passions that can lead to doors that may never be shut, at least know what you are dealing with. Know what you have because some packages are best left unshared.


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